David’s Account of the Proposal

I was planning on proposing to Nilsita back in January of this year. We went shopping for rings back in November since I started looking on my own and didn’t have a clue as to what style/size/shape she was interested in. We went to Diamond Brokers of Florida (www.dbof.com) in Melbourne, FL to select a style (I know it’s far, but we made a day trip out of it and had a lot of fun). I found them on www.diamondtalk.com. They were highly recommended and when I spoke with Jan and Brad (the husband and wife owners), they were extremely helpful. I had purchased diamond stud earrings for Nilsita on Valentine’s Day 2001 from them and was very pleased with their service.

What I had wanted to do was put the ring on the Christmas tree among the ornaments and have her find it while we were taking it down. However, her grandmother fell critically ill in mid-January and the time was not appropriate. I spoke with Nilsita about the fact that I would be waiting and she agreed it would be best (thanks for the advice Craig). Grandma thankfully recovered and was on the road to returning home by April. She came home in May and then I started planning on proposing. I knew what kind of ring Nilsita wanted so I went to Jan’s website and found a main stone that fit what Nilsita was looking for. I called Jan, told her that I found the stone I wanted. She steered me towards another, similar stone, with better measurements. What I ended up getting was a 1.06 ct. VS2 E princess cut diamond in a platinum setting with .25 ct. round side stones on each side (click here for the GIA report on the diamond and here for the Sarin report). I put the deposit down on May 24 and hoped to get the ring in two weeks. Well, turns out that by the time they ordered the setting and received it, it was four weeks already. I didn’t receive the ring in my hands until July 9.  Needless to say, I was very eager to propose.

For the past few months, everybody was asking “So, did you do it yet?” and I responded “Very soon.” I knew that I had ordered the ring and thought it would be here sooner, so I thought I’d be proposing sooner than I did. Anyway, the ring finally arrived and I knew the day was near. I had many thoughts about how I wanted to propose. Aside from the Christmas tree idea, my other leading contender was to take a romantic hot air balloon ride and fly over a field which had “Will you marry me?” displayed on it. To do this, we had to be at the hot air balloon launch site at 5 am. Knowing how well Nilsita knows me, she would have thought something was up. I had to be sure that she would have no idea this was happening so I decided on something else.

Every so often, when time permits, we prepare very special evenings of pampering and romantic dinners for each other. I usually do mine on Saturdays since she works that day and I am home, so I have plenty of time to get everything ready and go all out. Once I definitely knew the ring was coming, I set up a dinner for her. I told her that I knew how hard she was working lately, what with her moving and everything, and that she needed a relaxing night off just to be pampered. She agreed and the date was set: Saturday, July 13. I had a lot of work to do to get everything ready and as it turns out, something went wrong with almost everything!

The first thing I had to do was order the flowers. I needed to get 100 red roses for the event, so I went to my favorite floral website (www.calyxandcorolla.com) and ordered them. Normally, flowers from there come closed and open up within a day or two. So, since I wanted the roses to be in full bloom Saturday night, I ordered them for Thursday delivery. Sure enough, they arrived as scheduled on Thursday. I opened the box to cut the roses and place them in water and was horrified to find then sent me 100 assorted color roses!!!! I freaked. I called them up, very angry, and explained the situation. They said they were permitted to make substitutions, as per the terms of sale. I told them that this wasn’t substituting a hyacinth for a gladiola in an arrangement; this was sending me something I didn’t order. She took my information and told me I’d be receiving a call from customer service the next day. I was still upset, so I wrote them an email explaining the situation. The next day, I did receive a call from the director of their customer service department. She was very helpful and complied with my request to send out 100 red roses for delivery Saturday and that I could keep the others. Problem #1 was taken care of, at least until the red roses arrived for sure.

I had to take all the roses out of their packaging and place them somewhere to open up. I had no vase big enough for 100 roses, so I decided on the next best thing: a cooler! (What would you have done?). I filled it with water and rose food and proceeded to cut the excess leaves and stems off of each rose (under water and at an angle, of course) and placed them in the cooler. The bouquet was beautiful and they looked stunning. Too bad they weren’t all red! For those of you who have never trimmed 100 roses at once, it is tedious and I don’t recommend it. But anyway, the job was done. For now. Only 100 more to go on Saturday!

Next issue: the menu. It had to be something low-fat, but something flavorful. I found a wonderful recipe for a Chipotle-Rubbed Grilled Pork Tenderloin with Peach Salsa that was perfect. I decided to make that with Garlic Shrimp as an appetizer. Whenever we go out to dinner at a nice restaurant, we always order non-carbonated water and it comes in a glass bottle. One nice touch I like when we have a nice dinner at home is to have the same water in the same glass bottle as in the restaurant. Unfortunately, the only place that carries it that I had known about at the time was Epicure Market in Miami Beach. So, on Thursday night, I left work at 7:00 to get the water. I remembered that they close at 9:00, so I figured I had plenty of time. I arrived just a little after eight and strolled in only to be met by a security guard (aka Problem #2) who told me they were closed! I looked at him in horror and pleaded my case: “you can’t be closed! I just drove here from Coral Springs to get one thing for my wedding proposal dinner! PLEASE LET ME IN!!!!!” He saw how pathetic I looked and said “Fine, go in.” As I rushed in and grabbed a cart, I saw the manager walk by me and heard him tell the security guard “Why did you let him in?” and then heard the security guard start to recount the tale. I went straight to the area where they keep the water and heard someone coming up behind me. It was the manager. I thought to myself “oh man, here we go again” as I grabbed some bottles off the shelf and put them in my cart and made a quick u-turn to head towards the register. He stood in front of me, gave me this look, and said “Can I help you find anything?” I let out a huge sigh and asked him if he could get me a case of Acqua Panna water or Evian in glass bottles. He knowingly smiled and went to check as I casually made my way towards the meat department to stock up on Peter Luger steak sauce (hey, I was there already!). He met me at the register with a case of Evian, stating that was all they had. No Panna (my favorite). Oh well. So, I made my purchases and went home. Problem #2 avoided.

Friday night arrived and Nilsita and I had a date to go to the salon (What? Did you think I was going to say the movies or dinner?). We went and pampered ourselves and got all coiffed and groomed. I had left so many things in my house all over the place that I had to be sure we weren’t going home after that. Thankfully, we decided to go out to dinner and since I knew she had to be at work in the morning, I was in the clear since it wouldn’t be a late night.

Saturday morning: the big day. I woke up early since I had so much to do and I usually underestimate how long things take and I didn’t want to get caught short on time. I like to sleep in on Saturdays but some things are just worth waking up for! J The first thing I wanted to do was go and do all of the work I had to do outside the house so I knew that once I got home, I wouldn’t have to leave again. My only stop that morning was Whole Foods Market. I needed to buy the ingredients for dinner. However, FedEx hadn’t arrived yet with the flowers. I had the tracking numbers and made sure they were out for delivery and they were. I know my weekly FedEx driver is aware that I have my signature on file with them and they are permitted to leave packages at my door without a signature. However, I didn’t know if my regular route driver works Saturdays and I could take no chances on missing FedEx. It was 10 AM and FedEx has a noon guarantee on Saturdays. I couldn’t possibly wait that long! So, I wrote up a letter releasing them from liability and asking (practically begging) FedEx to leave the package and take the letter in lieu of my signature. I taped it to the outside of the door, said a prayer, and off I went. Whole Foods Market has the most wonderful produce department and a great seafood and meat counter as well. I got double of everything so in case I screwed up the recipe, I had extra and could start over. As I was walking out, I happened to walk by the bottled water aisle. I noticed San Pellegrino water there. I know that Panna was part of the San Pellegrino group at one time and thought to ask the manager if they could order me a case (for the future; you know I always stock everything in my house). I found a stockperson in the aisle and asked him to find the manager of that department so I could ask. He said that he remembers seeing something called Panna in the back and would go look for me. I told him I’d be around and he went off to look and I continued my shopping. He found me about 10 minutes later with a shopping cart containing a case of Panna! My face lit up! Not only did I have the perfect water for that evening, I now no longer had to schlep to Miami Beach to get it (Luger sauce is available on their website, I later learned, so I don’t have to go for that either – sorry Epicure). I asked him to hold it for me at the front register while I finished my shopping. He gladly agreed. Great! This is coming together perfectly, I mused.

Next stop was the cheese counter. I wanted to have a course that I could serve Nilsita while I prepared the appetizer (the worst part of cooking a romantic dinner is that you usually have to prepare it right then and there and thus your guest is sitting at the table alone and you miss out on relaxing before dinner with wine and an appetizer, enjoying your guest’s company; but I digress). I decided on a cheese course since a few months earlier, I purchased these nifty slate cheese boards that you write on with chalk to identify the various cheeses and I wanted to use it. After studying the selection (and they do have a fantastic selection), I purchased three types of Spanish Manchego cheese, aged for 6 months, 8 months, and 12 months; Canadian Black Diamond Cheddar; and a marinated Armenian string cheese that looked divine! Turns out that the decision to buy the cheese would be very important.

With my full cart, I rushed over to the register to check out and get home and get to work (still so much to do). I found the shortest line and noticed the cashier was an old lady who was moving pretty slowly. I figured the short line would make up for her speed, so I started unpacking my goods. She finally got to me and started scanning my stuff through. I asked her to find my water up there and she finally did. When she scanned it in, of course, as luck would have it, it was not in the system! ARGH!!! She dutifully called in a price check and, to make a long story short (too late, I know), 20 minutes later we found the price and I was paid up and on my way. I could have left it there, but I was so pleased to have it and it completed my plan so well that I just had to have it. Problem #3 resolved! Off to the house we go. I arrive home and can see from the street that my sign is no longer on the door and there are boxes waiting for me. Great! It worked.

I ran inside, brought the flowers into the house, got my shopping cart, loaded up the groceries into the basket, and went into the kitchen. I started to unpack all my groceries when Problem #4 hit me. I had the perfect idea in my head of how I was going to propose and was practicing what I was going to say all week and it sounded great. The only problem was that today, every time I was halfway into the proposal, I would get all choked up and become unable to speak. So, I had to find an alternative plan in a hurry. I decided that instead of asking her with words, I would write it on a cake. Having taken a few cake decorating classes in my time (go ahead, laugh all you want, but it came in very handy that day), I knew I could get a beautiful cake done in a hurry since I had everything I needed at home. The only problem was time: the cake needed time to cool before I frosted it. Well, I figured, I’ll have to improvise if I run very short on time. So, I immediately found my 12" heart pan and set off to make a beautiful cake. Problem #4 avoided.

I put the perishables in the refrigerator and left everything else in the cart (I was going to use it that day, so why unpack and put it away – I just grabbed what I needed from the cart as the day progressed). First thing to do, now that the cake was in the oven, was prepare the roses. Once again, I set off to trim 100 red roses. The only problem this time was that the red roses were sent intertwined with baby’s breath. Let me tell you: that stuff is such a pain to work with! First I had to get the roses away from the baby’s breath so I could prepare them for the cooler. Then, I had to get them back into the baby’s breath so they looked pretty. What a chore! But, as my cake was baking, I managed to get it done.

Nilsita called me while the cake was in the oven and I was cutting roses. I so enjoyed that call since I knew she had no idea what was going on and was just expecting a nice romantic dinner at home and not a marriage proposal. When she spoke to me, she said that she was going to get out of work early and come over sooner than planned! I fumbled for words as I tried to tell her “no, please don’t do that – I have too much to do.” She sensed that I needed more time and offered to go to the mall to kill some time. I said that was a great idea and hung up and breathed a deep sigh of relief. That was a close call! What if she had just showed up early to surprise me? That would have been disastrous! I needed a drink! This day was getting too stressful. Little did I know how very stressful it would become.

Finally, I finished cutting the roses and had a cooler filled with 200 of them. It looked magnificent. I took the cooler into one of the spare bedrooms so that in case she wandered around the house, she wouldn’t see them. The cake finished baking and I took it out, cooled it a little, sealed it, and waited for it to cool completely. Then, disaster struck! Just as I started to prepare the icing, Problem #5 arose.

Blackout!

My first thought was that I didn’t pay FPL, but I remember paying my bill the week before, so it couldn’t be that. Then I thought to myself “is this a sign from God?” I called FPL and they said a main line had gone down and the ETA for repair was 2 hours! 2 hours? It was 4:00 already. I didn’t have time to have no power. I continued forward as best I could and decided that this would be a perfect time to set the table and choose a wine.

I wanted the table to be very elegant, so I used our white tablecloth and napkins. For candles, on the table I used these very elegant heart shaped silver candleholders that each hold one thin ivory taper. For the votive holder by the front door, I cleaned that out and placed four fresh ivory colored vanilla scented votives in it and lit them immediately so the room would smell pretty. I set the table with our wine glasses, water glasses, and napkins in our silver napkin rings which looked very elegant. The table looked great, better than I normally make it look. Next, the wine selection.

In choosing a wine, I wanted to have a special bottle since I knew this would be a night we would remember forever. After much deliberation, I settled on a 1991 Etude Cabernet Sauvignon. It was one of the very first bottles I purchased for my cellar and it was ripe for drinking. I stood it up in the cellar so the sediment would settle as I continued preparing without power. Seeing as there was nothing else to do, I figured I may as well shower since I didn’t know if and when the power would come back and the hot water in the heater was just getting cooler as time went by. After my shower, I cleaned the bathroom and prepared it for Nilsita.  I promised her that she would be able to soak in the whirlpool and relax for a while when she came over. However, now without power, that plan was in jeopardy too! By now, it was 6:00 and Nilsita would be here any minute! I still had to prepare the frosting and decorate the cake. What was I going to do with her? I had already planned on having her take a relaxing soak, but with no power, what was I to do? Alas, fate helped me out again.

I placed two pink votives in frosted holders on the edge of the tub. On the counter were two five inch round glass bowls with a floating heart candle in each one. I knew the significance of the heart candles, which read “Be Mine,” but she didn’t. The room looked very inviting and I wished I could get into that whirlpool, but I had too much to do. I donned my Warner Bros. Tasmanian Devil cotton boxers with hearts all over them and set about my tasks.

Just as I was about to start preparing the frosting the old-fashioned way, the phone rang: it was the security gate. The computers were down, due to the blackout, and they couldn’t verify who was permitted into the development. It was Nilsita. Now, I had to think fast. I greeted her at the door and whisked her away into the bedroom. Thankfully, she was pretty tired and so was I. Since we had no power, there was nothing to do. So we decided to take a nap. We slept for a little while and I was soon awoken by the sound of the power returning. Thank God! Now, I can get back to work. Nilsita was still tired, so I told her that I had plenty to do and that she should just stay in bed and sleep. I told her that when she wakes up, she should call me before she comes out of the room. She smiled her acknowledgement and delight that I was working so hard for her, placed a pillow over her eyes, and went right back to sleep. I closed the doors and went back to the kitchen to finish up my tasks.

Now, I was working at warp speed since I had so much to do in almost no time. I prepared the frosting in a jiffy and frosted and decorated the cake as fast as I could. It didn’t come out perfect, but under the circumstances, it was going to have to do. I took the cake and placed it in the family room where Nilsita would not come near it. I had to control her movements within the house and keep her away from the kitchen and family room. While I was finishing up the cake, I had noticed the lights were on in the bedroom. I was mortified to think she might be sneaking up behind me so I ran to the bedroom and found her there brushing her hair. She had already taken a shower and freshened up and was all ready for dinner. I told her that due to the power being out, I still had a few things to do, and she could just stay in the bedroom and watch TV. She reluctantly agreed and at that moment, I remembered the cheese course! I enticed her and told her that I had a surprise for her. Her eyes lit up as she asked me: an edible surprise? I smiled and told her to get comfy and I’d be right back. She smiled back and hopped onto the bed, grabbed the remote, and looked for something to watch.

When I returned a few minutes later with a cocktail for her, she told me she found the MTV Video Music Awards on and was interested in watching it. Perfect, I thought. Since she has something good to watch, she won’t mind the time I need. Fate had smiled upon me and Problem #6 was avoided. I told her I’d be right back with the surprise. I prepared the cheese course on the board with some water crackers and served it to her in bed. She was delighted. I told her I’d come get her when I was ready. She had no problem with that.

I went back to the kitchen and got dinner going. It was fairly simple, but still took time to prepare. The most tedious part was peeling the raw shrimp: a task I plan on never doing again. They were small shrimp, as the recipe called for, and it was just so labor intensive. I was planning on peeling the whole pound and saving the extra, but at that moment I decided I’d halve the recipe (since it was for four anyway) and peel ½ pound, which was exactly what I did. Preparing the remainder of dinner wasn’t bad at all (I deliberately chose something that wasn’t that time consuming, once the prep work was done).

The rice was cooking, the shrimp were peeled, the wine was decanted, the water was in the ice bucket, and the candles were lit. It was showtime!

I placed a few slices of bread in the toaster and then went to the bedroom and escorted Nilsita to her seat at the table. She seemed very impressed with how neatly the table was put together (more than I usually do). I sat her down, poured her some wine, and went to get the bread. I came back with the bread, poured myself some wine, and offered up a toast “to the most wonderful woman I know.” We drank and I started to prepare the shrimp. I was back and forth throughout dinner between the kitchen and the table. It was hectic for me, but it all worked out very well and I still got to enjoy her company and a peaceful romantic dinner together.

After dinner, I told her that I had a very special surprise for dessert. I felt a little badly about this since I know how much she loves dessert and to tease her like that, without having a special dessert in place, was a little cruel. However, given the circumstances, I felt she would forgive me. I told her dessert was in the family room, but she couldn’t see anything until everything was set. I blindfolded her (with her eyeshades that she sleeps with) and carefully walked her to the sofa and seated her there. I told her to get comfy while I prepared everything. The lights were already dimmed to a nice, romantic level, but I raised them just high enough so she could see what was about to happen. I had already placed the ring in the bedroom near the flowers as well as a bath towel to place under the cooler so she wouldn’t hear me dragging it into the room. I brought the flowers in and placed them right at her feet. I had two heart shaped floating candles in one bowl on the table, which I lit. I placed the cake in one hand and was about to pick up the ring in the other when the cake started slipping off the plate. I grabbed it and almost shrieked as the cake was sliding off the plate, but contained myself and the cake just in time (could you imagine?). #7 avoided. I then carefully picked up the ring with my right hand, the cake firmly held in my other hand, the flowers right in front of her, and the candles lit in the background on the table. I told her she could open her eyes. When she did, she looked at me, the flowers, the ring, and then looked at the cake, which simply read “Will you marry me?”

She looked at me again and said “Are you serious?” to which I replied “Would I kid you about something like this?” She just looked at me. I said “Will you?” and she said “Yes!” We both smiled broadly and I could see tears welling up in her eyes and that made my eyes start to well up also. I carefully put the cake down, asked for her left hand, and placed the ring on her finger. She smiled broadly, grabbed me, and we just held each other for a long while. We were both getting emotional. It was such a special moment that words can’t describe how I was feeling. I was just so happy and so relieved that everything went off without a hitch. Once I had composed myself, I told her about my original plan and the significance of everything: there were 200 roses, one for every year that I planned on loving her, and the two candles in the bowl signified our two hearts, separate yet together, each burning brightly on its own, but together providing a light that is greater than the sum of the parts. She smiled and just held me again. It was the most special evening of my life and I will never forget it.

I am so pleased that we have made it to this point. As many of you know, it was not easy for us to get here, but we did and I have so many of you to thank for that. Every one of you has played a special part in our lives to this point and I thank you for supporting us and our relationship. Sorry this took so long and thanks for reading all of it. I wanted to be sure to get all the details in so that one day, my kids can look back and say “Dad, you were such a geek, but we still love you!”